Love Hurts
by Mallow64
Summary: Love hurts we all know that, now lets see how two perfect women chase a not so perfect guy. Oh and one of those women is not Tifa so if your a Tifa fan stay away.
1. Two weddings and a problem

Love Hurts  
  
Disclaimer: yeah yeah, you should all know that I could never own Final Fantasy and/or characters the only character that I do own is Sirea.  
  
Now a message from Mallow64  
  
Me: It took me a very long time but at least I finished the Sleeping Beauty-I love you Mommy saga. The story of little Iris learning of her past, her mother and her very first look at evil will open up a new saga. It will be entitled the Iris chronicles. It will be about Iris and her determination to become the most powerful fighter in the world just like her old man. The adventure itself will be like another Final Fantasy on it's own and trust me it will be VERY long but I'm determined to try something new. Also expect soon to see a sign up sheet for people to add any characters to my stories, more detail on that later. Now I want to take a small break and start writing something else.  
  
*Just than Iris walks in*  
  
Iris: hey Mallow! When will I get that series you promised?  
  
Me: oh hey Iris, you'll get it very soon I promise  
  
Iris: okay, but only cause your my friend *walks out the door and sounds of hundreds of flash photography can be heard* hey don't forget to take my good side, than again all my sides are good :)  
  
Me: gee, give her a half an hour of fame and she acts like a star, but I don't blame her. Writing Iris in my stories has been very exhilarating, now on to this story on hand. Do you remember, the story "How Far you will Go for Her?" yes it was the story where all the Cleris fans gathered and all said at the same time said "NO Cloud don't go with Sirea, please you love Aeris" or something like that. In the end however we find out Sirea was really Aeris and we are all happy. But let's stop and think about this what would have happened if Aeris was not Sirea? What will happen if both different people? Well that idea intrigued me a lot and I did what I always do when I get an intriguing idea, I start writing. Okay this story takes place in yet another Alternate timeline, the most obvious changes is that Sirea exists and is her own person and there was never a Sephiroth so everyone lived in peace.   
  
Now on to my new tale of spills, chills and well more spills that you can shake an Ultima Weapon at.  
  
  
Love Hurts   
  
*Scene at a church alter, Cloud is standing there obviously very nervous waiting for his bride to be. "Here Comes the Bride" starts playing as "she" strolls coolly down the aisle and takes her place next to Cloud, the Reverend Paul starts to speak*  
  
Reverend Paul: we have gathered here today, the join the union of Cloud Strife and his beloved to be, they have went through a lot to be together they have both claimed and they each have a few words to say to each other before we begin  
  
*Groans can be heard*  
  
Cloud: hey it's only going to be a few words, what's so bad with that?  
  
*The crowd all yell at Cloud to just get on with it*  
  
Cloud: all right, sheesh...*stares at his bride* well I never thought I see myself here today on the alter. However if it was to be with anyone than I am glad it's with you, Sirea Boroughaings (pronounced Bor-row-hings)  
  
Sirea a very beautiful girl who like Aeris is one year old than he is (what is up with Cloud going for older women?) She has long blond hair which she likes to keep flowing freely, piercing blue eyes. She was living on the streets beofre Cloud came and invited her to stay with him they eventually fell in love and she'll do almost anything for Cloud for all he's done except sleep with other men, take experimental drugs and well you get the idea nothing too crazy.   
  
Sirea: and I am too Cloud, I can never forget the first time we met. I was an orphan on the streets and always alone. I couldn't get job or anything. I was a total stranger to you Cloud but when we met you were my knight in shining armor, you rescued me and we are always together. How long have we been together? Well I'd say around 2 years, that would make you at least 19 and myself 20   
  
Cloud: yes I'll never forget that moment either you were there in that prison cell and I was able to release you and when you asked me why I rescued you I replied that you reminded me of someone  
  
Sirea: Cloud that was the plot for FF3/6, just because I sorta look like Celes doesn't mean that I am her  
  
Cloud: oh yeah...man I gotta stop playing that game it's starting to take over my mind but if I recall correctly here's what really happened  
  
*Cloud begins a flash-back but...*  
  
Crowd: YOU DON'T HAVE TIME FOR FLASHBACKS JUST KISS SO WE CAN GET TO THE FOOD ALREADY!!!!  
  
Cloud: geez, these people have no decency for a romantic moment, you may continue Reverend  
  
Reverend Paul: *fallen asleep bored* zzzzzzzzz  
  
Cloud: REVEREND!!!!  
  
Paul: *wakes up* huh, wha? Oh sorry, now let's continue do you Cloud Strife take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife to have and to hold for as long as you shall both shall live?  
  
Cloud: I do  
  
Paul: and do you, Sirea Boroughaings take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband to go through sickness and health till death do you part?  
  
Sirea: I do  
  
Paul: if ANYONE have any objections why these two should not be married, speak now or forever hold your peace  
  
Man: *raises hand*  
  
Paul: gee this never happened before well go on  
  
Man: your can't marry her she's a prostitute  
  
*Everyone gasps*  
  
Sirea: no I'm not  
  
Man: but you lived in the streets until you met Cloud  
  
Sirea: okay what is it with beautiful women that they live on the streets they are suddenly considered prostitutes? I AM NOT A PROSTITUTE!!!!!   
  
Cloud: Sirea, calm down...*whispers to her* I know your a virgin but just wait till the honeymoon  
  
Sirea: *grins* you naughty man Cloud  
  
Paul: okay any LEGIMATE reasons why these two shall not wed?  
  
Man#2: *raises hand* you can't marry SIREA!!!! AERIS IS YOUR ONE AND ONLY CLOUD!!! DID YOU HEAR ME??!! AERIS IS THE ONE!!!!  
  
*men in white suits than come and drag him away*   
  
Man#2: PLEASE SIREA IS NOT YOUR REAL LOVE *gets pulled away*  
  
Cloud: oooookay can anyone just tell me what just happened?  
  
Paul: um I'm assuming that no one else has anything to say so Cloud you may kiss the bride  
  
*Cloud than pulls Sirea into a passionate embrace and they kiss as the crowd applauds*  
  
*Several months later, Cloud and Sirea is happy living in Wutai*  
  
Cloud: are you sure you have to go? It's going to be lonely without you  
  
Sirea: *packing a suitcase* I know but the whole modeling job on the Costa De Sol beach pays extremely well and I still need to pay you back for all you've done for me you don't need to support me all my life. I'm a big girl I need to do what I can as well to support us both  
  
Cloud: I'm not worried about the whole money issue I'm kinda more worried about all those pervs on Costa De Sol who are going to stare at my beautiful wife in a string bikini  
  
Sirea: okay I admit I don't totally agree with this as well but Cloud you'll always be my one and only  
  
Cloud: and you'll be mine too  
  
*The two than kiss*   
  
Sirea: nothing can ruin this moment  
  
*which is when the electricity went out, several lamps somehow fell to the ground, someone crashed their chocobo through the kitchen and some Wutaian ninjas decided to run through the living room*  
  
Sirea: when will I learn to just keep me big mouth shut? Well I must catch my flight on the Big Bronco  
  
*A few hours later, after Sirea left Cloud is just chilling watching TV*  
  
Cloud: nothing good on  
  
Sports: and we get to see some HARDCORE action in the WOF: the World Old Federation, look as The Mock is about to hit the most electrifying move in sports entertainment, but OH MY GOD he fell asleep again oh and watch Cranky MAN just hit his opponent with his false teeth!!!  
  
Cloud: TV has hit a new low *turns the channel*  
  
News: a terrible accident has occurred and one of the local planes: The Big Bronco has crashed  
  
Cloud: Booooorrrring *flips the channel*  
  
Stock Market: hair gel has gone down another 5 percent  
  
Cloud: NNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! How do I keep my nice standing hair without hair gel? It's not all 100 percent natural you know, wait what was the name of the plane Sirea said she was going on? Oh no *flips back to news*  
  
News: the plane has crashed on the side of Mt. Gaea the crash looks bad and it would look like there were no survivors  
  
Cloud: *gasps*  
  
News: luckily all passengers and even the pilot, Cid who admitted he was drunk at the controls were found. They will all be returning home shortly  
  
Cloud: *breath a sigh of relief*  
  
News: they were all found except for Sirea Boroughaings, who is still missing  
  
Cloud: *gasps*  
  
News: search parties searched everywhere for her and may have found signs of her  
  
Cloud: *breaths a sigh of relief*  
  
News: but they turned out to be wrong and were lead into a dead end Sirea has now been pronounced dead  
  
Cloud: WHAT??!!  
  
News: I feel sorry for anyone with emotional ties to Sirea, both family and any lovers she might have had cause you know looking at her pictures, she was hot  
  
Cloud: SHUT UP!!!!  
  
News: oh yeah like if she was here right now I would be on her like a fly on fly paper it would be really sticky if you know what I mean  
  
Cloud: THAT'S MY WIFE YOU #$^$%^%$^$^  
  
News: in fact I feel really sorry for anyone who knew her now they would have to live with the fact that they could have stopped her but didn't and...  
  
*Cloud in his anger breaks the TV*  
  
Cloud: Sirea...dead? I don't want to believe it...Sirea wherever you are, will I be able to love anyone as much as you if you don't come back?  
  
*2 years pass by, in year 1, Cloud moved out of Wutai and to Nibelhaim because of all the memories of Sirea. He has now lived in Nibelhaim and he hears of no contact of Sirea, Cloud now fears she is gone. We now see Cloud sitting alone in a bar*  
  
Cloud: give me another one Tifa  
  
Tifa: geez Cloud all you ever do is drink and if your not doing that your at home someone like you needs to go out with a REAL woman  
  
Cloud: no  
  
Tifa: oh come on why, it's not like you were married to anyone special and she just happens one day to be pronounced dead in a place crash and...  
  
Cloud: *gives Tifa a Heero Yuy death glare* I don't really want to talk about it  
  
Tifa: oh I see, but Cloud you can't go through life like this. I know your thinking that you need to move on with your life and find someone else because that's what your wife would have wanted. Now your probably thinking you want to ask me out but you don't know what to say and now I say yes I'll be happy to go out with you, you can pick me up at eight  
  
Cloud: wah? What were we talking about?  
  
Tifa: you asked me out, remember? I said yes and we're going at eight don't worry my treat  
  
Cloud: um I guess if I asked you out, I should take you out well I'll see you soon  
  
*Cloud than can be heard as he is leaving "how did I get roped into this?"*  
  
*Later that night at some restaurant*  
  
Tifa: I hope you don't mind that a friend of mine and her date joins us  
  
Cloud: *not looking up and looking very uninterested* yeah yeah sure  
  
Tifa: now come on don't be like that  
  
Cloud: *still not interested* yeah yeah sure  
  
*Just than a familiar brunette enters the restaurant (we all know who she is):)*  
  
Tifa: oh hi, Aeris I'm glad you can make it, where's your date  
  
Aeris: *sigh* caught that jerk Zack macking off with some hussy, this time it's over  
  
Tifa: oh come on Aeris you keep saying that  
  
Aeris: I know but that was before I caught him cheating on me  
  
Tifa: good point, well Aeris I want you to meet my DATE, Cloud. Cloud, my DATE I would like you to meet Aeris.  
  
Aeris: why are you emphasizing on the word date?  
  
Tifa: whatever do you mean?  
  
Cloud: *still not looking up or interested* hi Aeris nice to meet you  
  
Aeris: I like your date's personality  
  
Tifa: he's usually not like this  
  
Aeris: well I better be going  
  
Tifa: oh no Aeris I wouldn't dream of it, stay please  
  
Aeris: well okay *sits down*  
  
*Later after they have ordered*  
  
Tifa: well I need to use the ladies' room, I'll be back *leaves*  
  
Aeris: so hi Cloud your Tifa's new boyfriend?  
  
Cloud: no, I'm only going out with her because I apparently asked her out  
  
Aeris: you seemed troubled why don't you tell me what's going through your mind?  
  
Cloud: what are you some sort of psychiatrist?   
  
Aeris: yes, that's my profession I'm also a part time botanist  
  
Cloud: right...(my luck)  
  
Aeris: so tell me what's troubling you  
  
Cloud: well it has lots to do with my departed wife and I how much I miss her  
  
Aeris: tell me, I'm listening  
  
*Later, Cloud has told every detail of his wife, Aeris like an expert psychiatrist explained Cloud's problems and how he can deal with them*  
  
Aeris: your crazy that's all stop brooding over a dead woman  
  
Cloud: you know Aeris I think that your damned quack advice isn't helping me  
  
*whoops wrong footage here's what really happened*  
  
Cloud: you know Aeris I don't know how, but you've made me feel a lot better  
  
Aeris: that's my job and always remember she'll always be a part of you and as long as you never forget her she'll always be at your side  
  
Cloud: thank you *smiles even though his head is still facing down*  
  
Aeris: oh come on Cloud at the very least let me see you face you've had your head downward since I got here show that you're not that depressed  
  
Cloud: all right *looks up and for the first time he sees Aeris, needless to say he is very stunned* y-your a psychiatrist?   
  
Aeris: yeah so?  
  
Cloud: well I was kinda expecting the more bookworm look when I envision a psychiatrist no offense but your-your WOW.  
  
Aeris: *blushes* thank you I'll take that as a compliment but don't judge a book by it's covers just because of what it's title is.  
  
Cloud: you must be a very beautiful book both inside and out  
  
Aeris: *smiles* thank you  
  
Cloud: so you just broke up with your boyfriend? Must have been tough  
  
Aeris: yeah he was a jerk anyway, but I should be the one feeling sorry for you with your departed wife and all  
  
Cloud: funny  
  
Aeris: what?  
  
Cloud: your the only person who can mention about her and I don't enter a blue funk depression there's something really special about you Aeris is there any way I can book another appointment?  
  
Aeris: *takes out and opens her appointment book* well I'm free...  
  
Cloud: no not that appointment I mean a...  
  
Aeris: a date? But you said  
  
Cloud: I realize that I can't go through life alone and your right Sirea will always be a part of me and life is too big to let it pass by me, I know Sirea would have wanted this  
  
Aeris: but what about Tifa?   
  
Cloud: what about Tifa? I'm only going out with her as a friend  
  
Aeris: well in that case, I want to meet you Cloud  
  
Cloud: is that a psychiatrist term?  
  
Aeris: no that's something I like to say to people like you  
  
*As the two smile and have romantic conversation, Tifa comes back after waiting in line to go to the ladies' room she sees Cloud and Aeris and she can take a hint she sits back down a little disappointed*   
  
Tifa: excuse me waiter?  
  
Waiter: yes what would the madam like?  
  
Tifa: cancel my order, give me the hardest liquor this place got  
  
*Several months pass, Cloud learns to fall in love again. Cloud slowly develops the special feelings that he had around Sirea for the emerald green-eyed brunette. It wasn't long after that he proposed to her and she accepted. Now at the church they are about to take their final step (coincidentally by the same reverend that married Sirea and Cloud)*  
  
Paul: do you Cloud Strife take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife to have and to hold for as long as you shall both shall live?  
  
Cloud: *smiles at Aeris* I do  
  
Paul: and do you, Aeris Gainsborough take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband to go through sickness and health till death do you part?  
  
Aeris: *smiles at Cloud* I do now and forever  
  
Paul: Paul: if ANYONE have any objections why these two should not be married, speak now or forever hold your peace  
  
*There appears to be none*  
  
Paul: you may kiss the bride  
  
*Cloud does so filled newfound happiness and emotions for his new wife but...*  
  
Woman: *runs into the church* STOP!!!  
  
Cloud: too late you should said that when he was asking for objections *turns around* It's you  
  
Aeris: huh? Who is this Cloud?  
  
Cloud: that's Sirea my first wife   
  
Aeris: WHAT??!! *faints*  
  
Sirea: um Cloud who was that?  
  
Cloud: that was Aeris my second wife, after I thought you were dead  
  
Sirea: WHAT??!! You married again? *faints*  
  
Cloud: man I'm bad at this  
  
To be continued....  
  
Next chapter we find out how what happened to Sirea during all this time and how Cloud is going to sort out this double wife problem  
  
Oh yeah for anyone who want's to know Sirea's last name Boroughaings is an anagram of Aeris' last name, sort out the letters you'll find it.  
  
Now lets see how the readers are going to react to this :)   



	2. 

Love Hurts  
  
Disclaimer: yeah yeah, you should all know that I could never own Final Fantasy and/or characters the only character that I do own is Sirea.  
  
Now a message from Mallow64  
  
*We see Mallow64 on a director's chair wearing one of those berets and holding a megaphone*  
  
Me: Hey people, Mallow speaking :). If your reading this thank you for sticking with me up till now. However if your not reading this than you're probably a reader who grew tired of my stories and I say I hate you people, just kidding "lol". I'm telling you though I can't wait to start writing my Iris Chronicles fic. It has been like an explosion inside of me that I just want to release to show the world, however I must keep calm the whole new series must be kept top secret.   
  
*Just than Iris comes in*  
  
Iris: it's gonna be great, like Mallow is pulling all the stops to make sure he's perfected the new series. It's going to be completely action packed and it's going to be filled with all new locations, new friends, enemies and people and it's going to have so many outrageous yet understandable plot twists your going to ask him "is he crazy? Or is he a genius?" Oh yeah and the whole exciting part about this is he's even writing up a teen version of me, that is SSSSOOOOOO KEWL!!!!   
  
Me: well thank you Iris, THANKS FOR ALMOST RUINING THE SURPRISE!!!!  
  
Iris: oops sorry, I'll be going now tee hee *leaves*  
  
Me: kids...okay now where were we last time? Oh yeah, Cloud and Sirea got married, Sirea got into an accident and was presumed dead, Cloud met Aeris through Tifa after Tifa's blotched attempt to get him to go out with her. Cloud just marries Aeris and now Sirea who's not dead makes the scene well now on to the story.  
________________________________________________________________________________________________  
  
*After both woman have recovered from fainting, it is after the wedding service so Cloud IS officially married to Aeris, all the guests have left and Cloud, Aeris and Sirea are eating cake and discussing events*  
  
Cloud: Sirea, it really is you I thought you were...  
  
Sirea: dead? Gone? Maggot food? Six feet under? Never comming back?   
  
Cloud: I was going to say passed away but you got the idea, so uumm what happened? Where were you for *looks at his watch* 2 years, 7 months, 5 weeks, 3 days, 4 hours, 8 minutes and 6 seconds, 7 seconds, 8 seconds  
  
Aeris: you kept track how long Sirea was missing?  
  
Cloud: well yeah doesn't EVERY husband do it?  
  
*There is a dead silence and crickets can be heard*   
  
Sirea: never mind, I'll tell you what happened Cloud  
  
*Flashback on the plane the Big Bronco*  
  
Sirea: man is it just me? Or is this plane a little shaky?  
  
Man: *obviously drugged up* hey peace pretty lady maybe EVERYTHING is shaky  
  
Sirea: riiiiiiiight, *calls for a flight attendant* umm is there something wrong with this plane?  
  
Attendant: *obviously very drunk* no *hick* ma'am it's just you *hick* imagination  
  
Sirea: this is weird  
  
*Gets up to head to the bathroom and notices that every passenger and flight attendant are all the same*  
  
Sirea: okay this is weird *realizes that she is the only passenger on the plane that's not drugged up or drunk* AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH okay okay don't panic if everyone is like this than what about the pilot? Oh crap  
  
*Rushes over to the cockpit*   
  
Sirea: please don't tell me that you're drunk  
  
Cid (the pilot): of course not I can handle my liquor very well just one thing?  
  
Sirea: yes?  
  
Cid: can you stop spinning so I can talk to you?  
  
Sirea: okay, this is bad  
  
*End flashback*  
  
Cloud: so you were the only okay passenger  
  
Sirea: that's right  
  
Aeris: that story sounds so absurd, like it sounds like it was made up by a teen in a desperate attempt to post on the internet so the public can read  
  
Sirea: hey who's telling this story? Me or you? Anyway, I tried to get the plane back on track but it crashed into the side of the mountain everyone amazingly survived the experience but I was thrown out of the plane before it crashed, knocked my head and developed temporary amnesia.  
  
Cloud: but there was search parties how come they didn't find you?  
  
Sirea: you know I don't know, now how I got off the mountain and regained my memory  
  
*Flashback*  
  
Sirea: man, who am I? Where am I? Why am I here? Why am I asking myself these questions?  
  
*Just than a man on a snowmobile passes by*  
  
Man: hey Miss!!!!  
  
Sirea: you talking to me?  
  
Man: yeah, have you seen this woman who amazingly looks exactly like you? *shows her a picture of herself*  
  
Sirea: *looks at the picture but amnesia prevents her from recognizing* no can't say I have  
  
Man: oh okay *and the idiot drives off*  
  
Sirea: what a nice man   
  
*A few hours later, Sirea is forced to crawl on the ground very cold*  
  
Sirea: so...cold...hate...this...mountain...hate being lonely...talking to myself  
  
*Just than an image of an old man appears*  
  
Old man: you must travel to Dagobah and train under my old master, Yoda  
  
Sirea: wrong frozen person, your looking for the delusional young man, I'm the cold lonely woman who can't remember anything about herself  
  
Old man: sorry *disappears*  
  
*Just than a very familiar author appears, yep it's me*  
  
Sirea: who are you?  
  
Me: don't be afraid  
  
Sirea: I'm not, how can I be afraid of a pudgy marshmallow?   
  
Me: low blow, low blow...anyway I've come to help you Sirea  
  
Sirea: and how would you know me? You happen to be a fanfiction author and your making a guest star appearance in one of your own fics and the reason you happen to know me is that you actually was the one who created me, is that it?  
  
Me: *laughing nervously* no, of course not how can you think of something so stupid?  
  
Sirea: *shrugs* it's a gift  
  
Me: okay on to helping you...now how to do that? I KNOW!!!!! *mysterously pulls out a labtop and types in "Sirea than regains her memory" and hits enter*   
  
Sirea: what's that going to...wait it's all so clear now!!!!!! I'm Sirea Bouorghaings and I'm married to Cloud, yeah I remember it all thanks mysterious marshmallow stranger  
  
Me: your welcome  
  
Sirea: um since you can help regain my memory can you get me off this mountain?  
  
Me: sure *types in "Sirea is off the mountain somewhere"* well my jobs done, bye *disappears*  
  
*a few minutes later*  
  
Sirea: huh? Where am I now?  
  
*She looks around to see she is in a moogle village underground*  
  
Sirea: hhhmmm I don't think he specifically stated where to put me...  
  
Moogle *comes up to her* KUPO!!!!!!!  
  
Sirea: *smiles* hi, little fella can you tell me how to get out of here?  
  
Moogle: kupo  
  
Sirea: uumm do you speak english?  
  
Moogle: *stares at her blankly and replies* KUPO!!!!! KUPPO!!!!  
  
Sirea: this is going to take some time  
  
*End flashback*  
  
Sirea: so I actually spent two years learning how to speak mooglese and learning how to get out of the moogle village  
  
Aeris: riiiiiiiiiight *whispers to Cloud* your first wife's crazy  
  
Cloud: never mind the only important thing is your home, Sirea *hugs her*  
  
Aeris: hey   
  
Cloud: oh sorry Aeris *hugs her* I know this is a lot to take in and thank you for being supportive  
  
Sirea: hey  
  
Cloud: oh sorry Sirea *hugs her*  
  
Aeris: hey  
  
Cloud: oh sorry hon *hugs Aeris*  
  
Sirea: hey  
  
Cloud: oops my bad *you know the drill*  
  
*Hours later*  
  
Aeris: well Cloud me and Sirea has come to a decision  
  
Sirea: that's right, while you were busy hugging us we were talking plans  
  
Cloud: *panting* so what is it?  
  
Aeris: you have to choose one of us...  
  
Sirea: or we'll both leave you  
  
Cloud: WHAT???!!! WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU'LL BOTH LEAVE ME???!!! Like I...  
  
Aeris: Cloud no offense or anything we both never pictured our married life to be shared with another woman or anything so don't take anything personally or anything  
  
Sirea: so Cloud who's it gonna be? Me or the quack?  
  
Aeris: actually I'm a psychiatrist and part time botanist  
  
Sirea: *shrugs* same thing...come on Cloud you have to love one of us more  
  
Cloud: um if you don't mind I might need a little thinking for this *drags Reverend Paul (who amazingly is still here) into a confession box*  
  
*Inside the Confession box later*  
  
Cloud: so that's my problem Reverend you have been able to always solve my problems before so do you have a solution now?   
  
Paul: okay now this is a very interesting problem, now you say you love both women?  
  
Cloud: with all my heart  
  
Paul: and your saying you HAVE to choose one?  
  
Cloud: or there both leaving   
  
Paul: well Cloud I can honestly say I don't have a solution for you  
  
Cloud: huh? Why?  
  
Paul: look how many people are going to come to me saying they "accidentally" married two women and can't solve who they love more?  
  
Cloud: well that couple on that sitcom...  
  
Paul: *glares at him*  
  
Cloud: *gasp* YOU MEAN TV HAS BEEN LYING TO ME ALL THIS TIME???!!!  
  
Paul: what do you think? That the stupid plot twists they are going to have is true  
  
Cloud: well...I  
  
Paul: never mind let's work on your problem, okay since you love both women and since you both got married in this church and thus are legally bonded to both of them, that technically states that both women are your life partners. Now we can do this the clean but painful way, you could tell both women that you love them but you could ruin both of their friendships for you...  
  
Cloud: *stares at him blankly* or?  
  
Paul: oh you could do this the quick and dirty way  
  
Cloud: ooooohhhh QUICK AND DIRTY, QUICK AND DIRTY!!!!!  
  
Paul: *sigh* Now this is what I think you should do, spend a day with both of them, you know at their job and what they do and what you find particularly interesting about them  
  
Cloud: you mean stalk them?  
  
Paul: stalk is such a mean and sinful word, it's more like careful observation, after your done that and you determined come back to me and I'll denounce one of your vows  
  
Cloud: you can do that?  
  
*Lifts up a briefcase and shows it to Cloud*  
  
Paul: I'm also a divorce lawyer  
  
Cloud: man they're making everyone lawyers these days  
  
*Cloud leaves the booth*  
  
Cloud: ladies I'm still uummm kinda undecided do you mind giving me a few days to think about it?  
  
Sirea: anything  
  
Aeris: Cloud we won't push you if you don't feel like it  
  
Cloud: thanks I'm glad I'm married to such virtuous women  
  
*When Cloud's back is turned Aeris and Sirea both give each other death glares*  
  
  
  
Day 1: Sirea  
  
*Scene is the Modeling agency that Sirea works for, Cloud has disguised himself as a janitor with one of those large caps so a-hem "no one" will notice him*  
  
Sirea: thanks for giving me my job back, it has been awhile (just until I can get a better line of work)  
  
Boss: no problem Sirea, I don't care how long our agency has to wait just as long as you can grace everything you model for, your beautiful, charismatic and all the men want you whether mentally or...*very suggestively* psychically  
  
Sirea: *giggles* that's nice boss, but I'm married and that means I'm a one man woman especially this one   
  
*Cloud smiles at this comment and continues to work*  
  
Boss: ah yes your husband, never heard of a bigger idiot in my life, imagine he "accidentally" marries a new woman. You know if I was him I rather never marry again than give up a vixen like you, like I said what an idiot, a buffoon, a moron   
  
Cloud: gggggggrrrrrr  
  
Sirea: HEY!!! Don't speak badly of my Cloudy like that or find yourself a new model  
  
Boss: okay okay *leaves* geez they're making them feistier everyday  
  
Photographer: okay Sir, what's it going to be today? Lingerie? Evening gowns? Or...  
  
Cloud: (please don't say bikini, please don't say bikini)  
  
Photographer: bikini  
  
Cloud: (DOH!!!!! Must keep anger to minimum, this is only a job...so who cares if many perverted and horney men get to see my wife)  
  
Sirea: really hard to say  
  
Photographer: you can pick whatever you like, you look good in everything  
  
Sirea: hhmmmm *picks up a lingerie* I wonder what Cloud's reaction will be if I wear this for him?   
  
Cloud: *prevents himself from drooling but notices that the photographer is drooling himself*   
  
Sirea: you know I think I'll surprise him   
  
Photographer: why don't you wear that now? I can get some great action shots  
  
Sirea: thanks for the suggestion but I don't Cloud would appreciate it flaunting my body like that, I'll try to wear things less skimpy  
  
Photographer: than why did you become a model?  
  
Sirea: well I didn't really want to, I only became a model to help support Cloud...*smiles* he's done everything for me I want to do everything for him  
  
Photographer: okay Sirea, I can't hide it I want you, come away with me  
  
Sirea: look I'm a married woman, I'm not going to cheat on him  
  
Photographer: he's not here he'll never know  
  
*Cloud in his fury removes his disguise*  
  
Cloud: HEY!!!!! QUIT HITTING ON WIFE YOU JACKASS!!!!  
  
Sirea: Cloud what are you doing here? *her eyes than get all dreamy* oh I get it your here to defend my honor from the big brute!!!! This is SO romantic, I never thought you had in you Cloud   
  
Photographer: who your calling a jackass, little man?  
  
*Cloud now notices the photographer is really a lot bigger and very much stronger than him*  
  
Sirea: don't let him talk to you like that, come on Cloud show him who you are!!!!  
  
Cloud: eep  
  
*After a few minutes of getting beaten up bad*  
  
Photographer: that'll teach you, little man  
  
*Sirea than taps him on his shoulder and when he turns around, Sirea flattens him with one punch*  
  
Sirea: and that will teach YOU to hurt my Cloudy  
  
*Sirea tends to Cloud*  
  
Sirea: oh Cloud I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that but I kinda got wrapped up in the moment  
  
Cloud: it's all right, I got a better shots in so technically I won  
  
Sirea: that's my Cloud *helps Cloud to the door* HEY BOSS!!!! YOU CAN HAVE THIS JOB, I QUIT!!!!!  
  
Boss: What the??!!! SIREA NO PLEASE DON'T!!! YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME!!!  
  
*His pleas are ignored as Cloud and Sirea leave*  
  
Cloud: you know there's a way you can make up for this  
  
Sirea: yeah?  
  
Cloud: do you still have that lingerie?  
  
Sirea: *smiles* tonight  
  
  
  
Day 2: Aeris  
  
*Scene is now psychiatry office that Aeris works for, Aeris is have a session with a very familiar psycho and Cloud is washing the window of the building*  
  
Aeris: *taking notes* now Mr. Sephiroth, I believe you have a very interesting problem  
  
Seph: *trying to look down her dress but is disappointed that he can't* and that is?  
  
Aeris: well, you seem to have a case of "obsession" you want to go to great lengths to obtain one big desire and you don't care what you have to do to obtain it. When you find out you can't have it you can't give it up, I haven't figured out what your obsession is, tell me do you know?  
  
Seph: what makes you think I'm obsessed? I'm never obsessed, say is that a new brand of perfume your wearing it smells really nice  
  
Aeris: I don't wear perfume and your straying off topic, maybe your afraid of telling me of your problems  
  
Seph: me?! I'm the Great Sephiroth I fear nothing  
  
Aeris: and will you quit saying that? It's getting annoying  
  
Seph: sorry, say that's a nice pendent can I "see" it?  
  
Aeris: uuumm okay *gives it to him*  
  
Seph: now this is very pretty...of course only pretty things should belong to you *drops it* oops  
  
Aeris: *looks at him funny and bends her knees to pick it up*   
  
Seph: DAMN!!!!!!! (she didn't bend over)  
  
Aeris: this may take some more time looks like I'm going to have to book another appointment how about sometime next week?  
  
Seph: NNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes a breath* OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO  
  
Aeris: what?   
  
Seph: no I need treatment NOW!!! What about our usual daily sessions?  
  
Aeris: I'm sorry but this is my last session this week I'm taking time off to spend with my husband   
  
Seph: but you don't need him and besides I'm not cured yet  
  
Aeris: okay I'm getting sick of playing Ms. I don't know psychiatrist, will you stop lusting over me? You're sick and perverted and your never going to impress me  
  
Seph: you knew?  
  
Aeris: well ya, like you do it every session I only pretended like I didn't know so I can paid more after I did finally cured you and you know why I did it? Because I want to support Cloud I want to do everything for him even if I have to take up annoying stalking patients like you to do it, I love him and only him  
  
Seph: but I want you Aeris  
  
*This is about the time, Cloud stupidly crashes through the window in a jealous rage*  
  
Cloud: hey you heard the lady, she doesn't want you, she doesn't want you  
  
Aeris: let me guess you followed me to work  
  
Cloud: I had good reasons  
  
Seph: YOU!!!! YOU WERE THE ONE THAT STOLE MY ONE TRUE LOVE FROM ME!!!! DIE!!!!!!!! *materializes a Masamune*   
  
Cloud: eep, how did he do that?  
  
Aeris: he's a type of patient who can't be cured  
  
*Sephy begins chasing Cloud around the room*  
  
Aeris: don't worry Cloud, I won't let anything happen to you...oh Sephy?  
  
Seph *stops instantly* yes??!!  
  
Aeris: drop the sword  
  
Seph: *does so*  
  
Aeris: good, *flattens Sephy with one punch* that is for lusting over me and trying to kill my husband!!!!  
  
Cloud: woah  
  
Aeris: hm? Oh you must not be used to seeing that, well a girl learns when she has to  
  
Cloud: so what are you going to do now?  
  
Aeris: well it's obvious I'm going to cancel all my sessions with that nut  
  
Cloud: that's great  
  
Aeris: well let's go home, there's a "session" I want to give you  
  
Cloud: *drools*  
  
  
  
Day 10: epilouge  
  
*After awhile of spending time with both women, Cloud felt confident of what he was going to do, he took both women to the roof of the church (so that they could be alone) and tell them what was his final decision was*   
  
Cloud: well, now I know what to say  
  
Aeris: go ahead Cloud just tell us  
  
Sirea: yeah your hurting us more but not telling us  
  
Aeris: but it doesn't matter who wins  
  
Sirea: yeah just as long as we're all stay friends  
  
Aeris: *smiles* that's right  
  
*The two women shake hands and share a hug as they turn to Cloud for his final answer*  
  
Cloud: well I....  
  
Time than freezes as a familiar person takes the stage  
  
Me: Hi everyone your probably wonder how this is going to end, well to tell you the truth there's MORE THAN ONE ENDING!!!!!!! Yep that's right I made up several endings for this story, I made some up myself while others I took advice from others and remember it's all in good fun so in I insult ANYONE, it's all for the purpose of humor and I do not mean it. Well without further ado the ALTERNATE ENDINGS!!!!!!!!! Oh and remember pick the ending you like best.  
________________________________________________________________________________  
  
Ending#1: Sirea, my first and only love  
  
Cloud: ...love you Sirea  
  
Sirea: Cloud  
  
Cloud: you were my first love and I want to be with you forever...I'm so sorry I didn't wait for you  
  
Sirea: Cloud, it's not your fault...you had to get on with your life and even if I had died I wouldn't have wanted to see you unhappy, I love you too Cloud  
  
*The two move in to kiss, with a sad but very happy Aeris*  
  
Cloud: *after breaking the kiss* Aeris, I'm...  
  
Aeris: no don't say anything, you two were meant to be together I was only here to help you and it looks like I did. You don't need me anymore, so Cloud for everyone's sake just be happy  
  
*Cloud smiles Aeris a thank you as Sirea and Cloud moves in for another kiss*  
________________________________________________________________________________  
  
Ending#2: Aeris thank you for being there  
  
Cloud: ...love you Aeris  
  
Aeris: Cloud  
  
Cloud: Thank you for helping me and standing by me, when Sirea came back you didn't hold a grudge on her or me or anything. Aeris when I thought Sirea died you always there and I just feel I don't deserve you sometimes you standing by me even though I was so unfair to you  
  
Aeris: Cloud, it's not your fault...you were trying to keep your relationship alive with Sirea, and I don't mind if you didn't choose me just as long as you were happy...oh Cloud I love you too  
  
*The two move in to kiss, with a sad but very happy Sirea*  
  
Cloud: *after breaking the kiss* Sirea, I'm...  
  
Sirea: no don't say anything, you two look like you were meant to be together, you look like you need each other more so Cloud for everyone's sake just be happy  
  
*Cloud smiles Sirea a thank you as Aeris and Cloud moves in for another kiss*  
  
Ending#3: French isn't always the word for love  
  
Cloud: ...well can you two come over here?  
  
*Sirea and Aeris moves in as Cloud whispers something to them, Sirea and Aeris than look at Cloud angrily at him*   
  
Cloud: what? It's a French word  
  
Sirea: you pervert  
  
Aeris: don't you even care for our feelings?  
  
Cloud: I do I would also like to be with you both  
  
Sirea: yeah but that is SO SICK!!!!!!  
  
Cloud: is that a yes?  
  
*Aeris and Sirea attack Cloud as the screen fades*  
______________________________________________________________________________________  
  
  
  
Ending#4: Or maybe it is?  
  
Cloud: ...well can you two come over here?  
  
*Sirea and Aeris moves in as Cloud whispers something to them, Sirea and Aeris than look at Cloud a little silent at him*   
  
Cloud: what? It's a French word  
  
Sirea: why not?  
  
Aeris: well I love you a lot  
  
Sirea: so do I...do you Cloud?  
  
Cloud: I do I would also like to be with you both, I love the both of you  
  
Aeris: Cloud I'll never leave you side and that's the way you feel than I'll stay with you  
  
Sirea: neither will I  
  
Cloud: thank you, I promise I'll love the both of you till the end  
  
*Scene fades as all move in for a group hug*   
________________________________________________________________________________  
  
Ending#5: It doesn't matter who wins just as long as Tifa dies  
  
Cloud:...love...  
  
*Just than Tifa bursts in*  
  
Tifa: STOP!!!! YOU LOVE ME CLOUD!!!!!!  
  
Cloud: no I don't and leave me alone, DAMN I JUST WISH YOU DIE, SOMETIMES!!!!  
  
*Just than a mysterious figure in black descends down from no where and stabs her in the back and kicks her off the blade. The kicks causes her to fall off the church*  
  
Cloud: oh MY GOD!!! *rushes over to edge* oh I hope those parked cars will break her fall  
  
*Sounds of crashing can be heard*  
  
Cloud: well maybe one of those speeding cars will stop to help her  
  
*Sounds of cars running over Tifa can be heard*  
  
Cloud: ow, maybe that passing circus with those elephants will stop for her  
  
*The circus and elephants go by not noticing and tramples her*  
  
Cloud: ooookay maybe those tanks will stop, wait a minute...TANKS??!!  
  
*Tanks run over her as well*  
  
Sirea: *looking over* I'm not a doctor Cloud but I don't think Tifa can bend like that  
  
Cloud: *whirls to the Figure* YOU KILLED TIFA!!!!!!  
  
Figure: do you really care for her?  
  
Cloud: well...no but that's not the principal of the whole thing  
  
Aeris: who are you anyway?  
  
Cloud: I know it must be Reverend Paul  
  
*Paul enters*  
  
Paul: no I'm here  
  
Aeris: I know it must be Sephiroth  
  
*Seph enters*  
  
Seph: no my love I did not do this  
  
Aeris: AAAHHHH!!! *shoves Sephiroth off the roof* sorry reflex action  
  
Sirea: I know it must be the author himself, Mallow64  
  
*I enter*  
  
Me: nope I didn't do it either  
  
Cloud: than if Paul didn't do it and Sephy didn't do it and you didn't do it...who's *points at the figure* that person  
  
Me: I know it's none other THAN...!!!!!  
  
*I rip off the figure's mask as everyone gasps*  
  
(Only I know, hee hee hee try and take a guess)  
________________________________________________________________________________   
  
Ending#6: Bizarre ending  
  
Cloud:...I...  
  
*Just than a group of moogles enter*  
  
moogle: KUPO KUPO!!! (My queen, we have come to help you)  
  
Sirea: kupo, kupppo (not now guys)  
  
Aeris: how do they communicate by only saying kupo?  
  
Cloud: *shrugs*  
  
Moogle: kupo kupo (we see that you need help)  
  
Sirea: kupo..(don't worry I can do this) so Cloud you were saying, kupo? Sorry force of habit  
  
Cloud:.....  
  
________________________________________________________________________________  
Ending#7: the make up your own ending   
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
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The End :)  
  
Well that stories done, now what's next for Mallow? My greatest masterpiece THE IRIS CHRONICLES!!!!!!! I can't wait to get started on that and for those of you who know they have a character in the story, I like to say thank you, thank you for giving me the honor to write you guys in it. Thank you for always supporting me I can never get this far without you, I will try to write about you guys as bes as I can. :)  
  
Okay I may have made a few people out of character and I'm really sorry for killing off Tifa if it offended you Tifa fans, I was only doing it for humor.  
As well I made a guest appearance in my own fic and yes I did act like a "goof" but let me make something clear I did that for humor as well.  
  
Oh and I like to say I'm kinda still one character short for the Iris Chronicles so if anyone's interested give me your e-mail, and I'll help put you in the story guaranteed. :)   
  
And to everyone else, PEACE!!! :)  



End file.
